Week of Weakness
To be sick is to be weak. Or something like that. All week I have been basically feeling like crap. It's beautiful outside, the kind of weather that makes you want to wear a skirt and tank top, that calls you outdoors -- and I have been ill. I spent Monday in bed but the rest of the week, I worked long hours, kept social engagements, got very little sleep and felt like I was in battle the entire time. It is so completely frustrating to be physically weak, to be unable to keep up with the pace of life. I am really glad my week of weakness is finally over.
In other news, go see Over The Hedge.
Friday, May 19, 2006
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Public Apology to the Nice-Seeming Girl On The Metro Who I Cut Off When The Door Chime Chimed
I only did it because I was afraid of being stuck on the train. I really appreciated you moving your hand to another pole in order to make room for my hand. I am sorry I did not afford you a similar courtesy and instead yelled out "are you kidding me?" to noone in particular when the driver chimed the door closing chime 20 seconds after the doors opened. I am also sorry that I then pushed ahead of you and out the metro door, not looking back until I was safely on my way up the escalator. It did look like you got off, though. So that's good. But I'm still sorry.
I only did it because I was afraid of being stuck on the train. I really appreciated you moving your hand to another pole in order to make room for my hand. I am sorry I did not afford you a similar courtesy and instead yelled out "are you kidding me?" to noone in particular when the driver chimed the door closing chime 20 seconds after the doors opened. I am also sorry that I then pushed ahead of you and out the metro door, not looking back until I was safely on my way up the escalator. It did look like you got off, though. So that's good. But I'm still sorry.
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Singing in the Rain
Today, due to a series of unforeseen circumstances, Neil and I ended up walking at least 30 blocks in the pouring rain. It was awesome. So what if I am now chilled to the bone, so what if our clothes were soaked, it was great. It made me want to sing (in fact I did sing). There's something about getting soaked that is cleansing and not just because I got all wet. No, I wasn't in the mountains in New Mexico (my preferred location for getting completely soaked by a downpour) but the streets of DC were just fine. Neil thought I was slightly crazy for being so excited when the rain started pelting us, but I think he eventually came to see my position on the issue. Thank you rain.
In other news, only a little more than an hour before Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy come on. I am an addict. I confess. But Sunday night TV rocks. What does not rock is the fact that the season ends in another week and I will be stuck with a cliffhanger ending and nothing to watch. But maybe I will do something more useful with my Sunday evenings?
Something I have been meaning to blog about since mid-April:
Growing up in New Mexico, one becomes very familiar with a certain lawyer who not only advertises on television, but also has had a billboard on the I-25 corridor with his face on it for at least the past 20 years. In addition to knowing the words to Sesame Street and the 321 Contact theme song as a child, I could also recite -- with all the right inflection -- "I'm Ron Bell and I sue drunk drivers." I could also tell you that to reach Ron Bell, one only needed to dial 898-BELL. Finally, If I ran into him on the street -- not that I ever did -- I would have been able to recognize the short, curly-haired man in a heartbeat.
Flash forward 20 years. When we moved to Albuquerque, Neil also became familiar with Mr. Bell. Only, the tagline had changed to "Ron Bell: Truck Accident Attorney". The phone number was the same, the face also the same. I suspected plastic surgery, but then again, men do age more gracefully than woman.
In mid-April, while walking through the Chicago Midway airport on our way back to D.C. a woman Neil worked with in New Mexico came screaming across the wide aisle of the terminal, "NEEEEEIIIILLLLLLL!!!" Some hugging and catching up ensued. I was introduced and then, a small curly-haired man popped out from behind the woman, extended his hand and said, "Hi! I'm Ron Bell!" At this moment I desperately wanted to say, "I know. You sue drunk drivers. Nice to meet you." Similarly, Neil had a yen to say "Truck accident attorney?" We both managed to control ourselves and simply say, "Nice meeting you." Which was really a gift because Ron went on to tell us about having just come from a relative's briss in Schaumberg and how nice his new girlfriend (Neil's friend) was to come along to such an occasion. Now, how often to you get to hear a local celebrity ramble about a relative's briss?
Of course, after the encounter, Neil and I came up with many other great responses to poor Ron's initial introduction. What I wonder is, why not just say, "Hi I'm Ron."? If I ever meet him again, I think I will make that recommendation. If he only used the first name, people would still know who he was, but may not be so compelled to follow his introduction with one of his ubiquitous tag lines. Of course any man who plasters his face on a billboard for nearly two decades, would probably be thrilled to see that his marketing dollars have not gone to waste. I have his freaking phone number memorized. Maybe I should not have pretended not to know who he was. Perhaps I should have just come out with it. "And you sue drunk drivers. 898-BELL right?"
Today, due to a series of unforeseen circumstances, Neil and I ended up walking at least 30 blocks in the pouring rain. It was awesome. So what if I am now chilled to the bone, so what if our clothes were soaked, it was great. It made me want to sing (in fact I did sing). There's something about getting soaked that is cleansing and not just because I got all wet. No, I wasn't in the mountains in New Mexico (my preferred location for getting completely soaked by a downpour) but the streets of DC were just fine. Neil thought I was slightly crazy for being so excited when the rain started pelting us, but I think he eventually came to see my position on the issue. Thank you rain.
In other news, only a little more than an hour before Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy come on. I am an addict. I confess. But Sunday night TV rocks. What does not rock is the fact that the season ends in another week and I will be stuck with a cliffhanger ending and nothing to watch. But maybe I will do something more useful with my Sunday evenings?
Something I have been meaning to blog about since mid-April:
Growing up in New Mexico, one becomes very familiar with a certain lawyer who not only advertises on television, but also has had a billboard on the I-25 corridor with his face on it for at least the past 20 years. In addition to knowing the words to Sesame Street and the 321 Contact theme song as a child, I could also recite -- with all the right inflection -- "I'm Ron Bell and I sue drunk drivers." I could also tell you that to reach Ron Bell, one only needed to dial 898-BELL. Finally, If I ran into him on the street -- not that I ever did -- I would have been able to recognize the short, curly-haired man in a heartbeat.
Flash forward 20 years. When we moved to Albuquerque, Neil also became familiar with Mr. Bell. Only, the tagline had changed to "Ron Bell: Truck Accident Attorney". The phone number was the same, the face also the same. I suspected plastic surgery, but then again, men do age more gracefully than woman.
In mid-April, while walking through the Chicago Midway airport on our way back to D.C. a woman Neil worked with in New Mexico came screaming across the wide aisle of the terminal, "NEEEEEIIIILLLLLLL!!!" Some hugging and catching up ensued. I was introduced and then, a small curly-haired man popped out from behind the woman, extended his hand and said, "Hi! I'm Ron Bell!" At this moment I desperately wanted to say, "I know. You sue drunk drivers. Nice to meet you." Similarly, Neil had a yen to say "Truck accident attorney?" We both managed to control ourselves and simply say, "Nice meeting you." Which was really a gift because Ron went on to tell us about having just come from a relative's briss in Schaumberg and how nice his new girlfriend (Neil's friend) was to come along to such an occasion. Now, how often to you get to hear a local celebrity ramble about a relative's briss?
Of course, after the encounter, Neil and I came up with many other great responses to poor Ron's initial introduction. What I wonder is, why not just say, "Hi I'm Ron."? If I ever meet him again, I think I will make that recommendation. If he only used the first name, people would still know who he was, but may not be so compelled to follow his introduction with one of his ubiquitous tag lines. Of course any man who plasters his face on a billboard for nearly two decades, would probably be thrilled to see that his marketing dollars have not gone to waste. I have his freaking phone number memorized. Maybe I should not have pretended not to know who he was. Perhaps I should have just come out with it. "And you sue drunk drivers. 898-BELL right?"
Saturday, April 29, 2006
Delinquent Blogger
Oh my goodness, what happened to me???
This month:
Patty P. visited for the Cherry Blossom Festival during which we saw the most amazing flowers ever and toured the White House gardens.
Neil's aunt Bella visited and so did his cousins and we went to the White House and cherry blossoms with them, too.
We went to New Mexico where we saw my crazy family and it was actually really great. We got to breathe in mountain air, sleep with the window open, see stars in the sky, hang out with good friends over my dad's expertly made margaritas, spend quality time with family, eat green chile, walk on the plaza and basically, I got to feel my feet on the ground where I have roots, recharge my battery and get back on the airplane feeling happy to be going home even if a small part of me also felt like I was leaving home. Of course, we didn't even stop in Albuquerque and we didn't get to visit our old neighborhood or our old offices and co-workers etc. but there's always time to do that when we go back in Sept. for the as-yet-unplanned 10-year high school reunion...augh.
When we returned from NM, our dogs had basically stopped eating and now we have to sit with them for at least 20 minutes at meal time in order to get them to eat. I also returned to massive amounts of stress at work, but what's new. The good part is that the weather has been amazing. When there is blue sky in the morning and I don't have to wear a heavy winter coat, it feels as if the world is full of possibilities.
Right now, Neil's dad is in town and his cousin and her baby are also in town (separate from his dad). So the weekend will be busy with visitors. On Sunday, I am going to the Save Darfur Rally on the Mall. If you don't know about the genocide taking place in Darfur, educate yourself about it.
And finally, a thought from my long walk home from work today. iPods are awesome and amazing, but are they also a way of supressing the human urge to sing along? When people in the 80's carried boom boxes on their shoulders, singing to the music was the norm. But there is something about singing to a song nobody else can hear that is a tad disconcerting -- so most people do not do it. When you are accompanied by background music, you always sound better than when you try to go it alone. So I wonder is suppressing my urge to bust out singing on my daily commute is also making me less likely to sing at other times?
Clearly, I need to think less and get more sleep.
Ciao.
Oh my goodness, what happened to me???
This month:
Patty P. visited for the Cherry Blossom Festival during which we saw the most amazing flowers ever and toured the White House gardens.
Neil's aunt Bella visited and so did his cousins and we went to the White House and cherry blossoms with them, too.
We went to New Mexico where we saw my crazy family and it was actually really great. We got to breathe in mountain air, sleep with the window open, see stars in the sky, hang out with good friends over my dad's expertly made margaritas, spend quality time with family, eat green chile, walk on the plaza and basically, I got to feel my feet on the ground where I have roots, recharge my battery and get back on the airplane feeling happy to be going home even if a small part of me also felt like I was leaving home. Of course, we didn't even stop in Albuquerque and we didn't get to visit our old neighborhood or our old offices and co-workers etc. but there's always time to do that when we go back in Sept. for the as-yet-unplanned 10-year high school reunion...augh.
When we returned from NM, our dogs had basically stopped eating and now we have to sit with them for at least 20 minutes at meal time in order to get them to eat. I also returned to massive amounts of stress at work, but what's new. The good part is that the weather has been amazing. When there is blue sky in the morning and I don't have to wear a heavy winter coat, it feels as if the world is full of possibilities.
Right now, Neil's dad is in town and his cousin and her baby are also in town (separate from his dad). So the weekend will be busy with visitors. On Sunday, I am going to the Save Darfur Rally on the Mall. If you don't know about the genocide taking place in Darfur, educate yourself about it.
And finally, a thought from my long walk home from work today. iPods are awesome and amazing, but are they also a way of supressing the human urge to sing along? When people in the 80's carried boom boxes on their shoulders, singing to the music was the norm. But there is something about singing to a song nobody else can hear that is a tad disconcerting -- so most people do not do it. When you are accompanied by background music, you always sound better than when you try to go it alone. So I wonder is suppressing my urge to bust out singing on my daily commute is also making me less likely to sing at other times?
Clearly, I need to think less and get more sleep.
Ciao.
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Border
I have been thinking about the border, about Mexico, about immigration since I moved to El Paso in the summer of 2000. Long before there was Sept. 11, before George W. Bush moved into the White House, before there was a national debate about "illegals", I began to ponder what a border really means.
In El Paso, there is a place called Monument One where the border between the U.S. and Mexico stops being a river and turns into a line in the sand marked by white obelisk that span for miles and miles. In some places there are fences, but in other places, the border is literally a line drawn in the sand. Living in a border city, it becomes apparent that the border is not a permanent line, an impermeable wall, something uncrossable like an ocean, it is porous, it is alive and it is filled with ambiguity. I fell in love with the border culture, with El Paso and Juarez and the people who inhabit the strange place where two nations meet. I even fell in love with the ambiguity of living on the border. I met people whose families struggled to make sure they were born in America and could have a better life. I met students who crossed the bridge and passed through customs daily in order to attend an American university. I met an engineer from the University of Michigan who crossed into Mexico daily to work in an auto plant and be around coworkers who spoke the language she loved.
I have two things to say about the immigration debate raging in Congress right now. First of all, why do the people in power suddenly care about this? We have millions of people living in our country and working in jobs that pay too low to attract American citizens. This is not a situation that cropped up overnight. This is systemic. Secondly, how on earth can this great nation of immigrants even consider not letting our neighbors stay? "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free..." Our country is about freedom, it is about immigrants. Sure, the people who are illegally in our country should go through a process of immigration. And the immigration system should be fixed so that people don't feel the need to risk their lives in order to cross a line in the desert sand. Yes, we have national security issues to worry about, but we cannot build a bubble around the United States. Anyone who has lived on the border will tell you that there isn't a way to make us completely safe. It is never black and white. Laws may make improvements (if they are the right laws), but they cannot change the nature of our borders -- borders in general. Lawmakers need to really think about what they are doing and about what our borders mean and what they are - what our country means and what we stand for.
I have been thinking about the border, about Mexico, about immigration since I moved to El Paso in the summer of 2000. Long before there was Sept. 11, before George W. Bush moved into the White House, before there was a national debate about "illegals", I began to ponder what a border really means.
In El Paso, there is a place called Monument One where the border between the U.S. and Mexico stops being a river and turns into a line in the sand marked by white obelisk that span for miles and miles. In some places there are fences, but in other places, the border is literally a line drawn in the sand. Living in a border city, it becomes apparent that the border is not a permanent line, an impermeable wall, something uncrossable like an ocean, it is porous, it is alive and it is filled with ambiguity. I fell in love with the border culture, with El Paso and Juarez and the people who inhabit the strange place where two nations meet. I even fell in love with the ambiguity of living on the border. I met people whose families struggled to make sure they were born in America and could have a better life. I met students who crossed the bridge and passed through customs daily in order to attend an American university. I met an engineer from the University of Michigan who crossed into Mexico daily to work in an auto plant and be around coworkers who spoke the language she loved.
I have two things to say about the immigration debate raging in Congress right now. First of all, why do the people in power suddenly care about this? We have millions of people living in our country and working in jobs that pay too low to attract American citizens. This is not a situation that cropped up overnight. This is systemic. Secondly, how on earth can this great nation of immigrants even consider not letting our neighbors stay? "Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free..." Our country is about freedom, it is about immigrants. Sure, the people who are illegally in our country should go through a process of immigration. And the immigration system should be fixed so that people don't feel the need to risk their lives in order to cross a line in the desert sand. Yes, we have national security issues to worry about, but we cannot build a bubble around the United States. Anyone who has lived on the border will tell you that there isn't a way to make us completely safe. It is never black and white. Laws may make improvements (if they are the right laws), but they cannot change the nature of our borders -- borders in general. Lawmakers need to really think about what they are doing and about what our borders mean and what they are - what our country means and what we stand for.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Lately
I haven't been around the internet lately. I am at work for so many hours and it's so intense that when I get home, I avoid a few things: the computer, the phone, reading, talking in general, thinking. This basically leaves me to watch TV or workout. Sure, I am exaggerating... but just a little.
Today has been a strange day. I had only a couple sips of coffee this morning because it tasted terrible. I suspect it was made incorrectly, that or the cream I put in had gone bad. Mmm. So anyways, I have been in a caffeine-less haze for most of the day. I accomplished a few things at work and was feeling pretty good for a few hours, but now I am experiencing the inevitable post-lunch crash. I had a taco salad (yum) which is pretty healthy and not too heavy, but it is still making me sleepy.
I finished reading the book Saturday by Ian McEwan last night (actually this morning...) I thought I didn't like the book while I was reading, but it turns out I really love it. The writing is really quite amazing and moving.
My friend Johnny has a cool new blog that is worth checking out. I am not sure why he is so anti-goat. Personally, I'm pro-goat. They are cute. They make tasty cheese. Johnny is the friend whose pants-burning New Years Eve party I attended -- he is completely wacky in all of the good ways.
In mid-April, I will be leaving D.C. for the first time since arriving here last November. It is about time for a short trip home to NM to see the family, breathe the mountain air, eat green chile and feel grounded for a moment. I am like a rechargable battery, always needing to return to my home base to gain the strength I need to carry on. Not the prettiest simile, but it works.
Clearly, I need some caffeine. For some reason, I am pleasantly reassured by my addiction to the stimulant. But I really have become dependent on it. Waiting until this late in the day to get my fill is completely crazy. Here's to a more caffeinated post next time.
I haven't been around the internet lately. I am at work for so many hours and it's so intense that when I get home, I avoid a few things: the computer, the phone, reading, talking in general, thinking. This basically leaves me to watch TV or workout. Sure, I am exaggerating... but just a little.
Today has been a strange day. I had only a couple sips of coffee this morning because it tasted terrible. I suspect it was made incorrectly, that or the cream I put in had gone bad. Mmm. So anyways, I have been in a caffeine-less haze for most of the day. I accomplished a few things at work and was feeling pretty good for a few hours, but now I am experiencing the inevitable post-lunch crash. I had a taco salad (yum) which is pretty healthy and not too heavy, but it is still making me sleepy.
I finished reading the book Saturday by Ian McEwan last night (actually this morning...) I thought I didn't like the book while I was reading, but it turns out I really love it. The writing is really quite amazing and moving.
My friend Johnny has a cool new blog that is worth checking out. I am not sure why he is so anti-goat. Personally, I'm pro-goat. They are cute. They make tasty cheese. Johnny is the friend whose pants-burning New Years Eve party I attended -- he is completely wacky in all of the good ways.
In mid-April, I will be leaving D.C. for the first time since arriving here last November. It is about time for a short trip home to NM to see the family, breathe the mountain air, eat green chile and feel grounded for a moment. I am like a rechargable battery, always needing to return to my home base to gain the strength I need to carry on. Not the prettiest simile, but it works.
Clearly, I need some caffeine. For some reason, I am pleasantly reassured by my addiction to the stimulant. But I really have become dependent on it. Waiting until this late in the day to get my fill is completely crazy. Here's to a more caffeinated post next time.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Whelmed
I keep having all kinds of good ideas for blogging, but I am usually in a tunnel underground, walking someplace or in the shower when the ideas strike... never near a computer. I have been absent from this space lately not because nothing is happening, just because it's never convenient to write about it and when I can, I don't feel inspired. I think part of this might be the fact that I am so busy doing social/external things that my intellectual/private life has been ignored a bit. I am reading a lot still and I do have my daily walk during which I think and listen to music, but I am missing the restorative stillness that I used to incorporate in my days. I am not quite sure how to get that back.
On the other hand, I am having a blast. Work is hard, but I'm finally playing hard too. We go out on weeknights. We have plans. There are things to do. It's really nice.
Last weekend there was a warm spell that allowed Neil and I to spend Saturday rollerblading and getting slight sunburns. I got to wear sandals and sleveless shirts. It was amazing.
A couple of weekends ago my parents came to visit. Much fun was had. We went to a play, Fanny's First Play, which was very entertaining, we toured Mt. Vernon, we ate at amazing restaurants and just had a good time. It's nice to see family, especially being so far away from home.
Some things I have wanted to blog about but haven't had the chance:
*How deeply I love Grey's Anatomy (so much that I like to watch episodes over and over again)
*How being swamped at work is a major social problem
*My need to travel
*New music loves: Idan Raichal Project, Belle and Sebastian's Life Pursuit, Brandi Carlisle
*Strange encounters with DC people who want me to give them one of my dogs
Movie trivia bonus points to the reader that can tell me (in my comments section) which movie the title of this post comes from.
I keep having all kinds of good ideas for blogging, but I am usually in a tunnel underground, walking someplace or in the shower when the ideas strike... never near a computer. I have been absent from this space lately not because nothing is happening, just because it's never convenient to write about it and when I can, I don't feel inspired. I think part of this might be the fact that I am so busy doing social/external things that my intellectual/private life has been ignored a bit. I am reading a lot still and I do have my daily walk during which I think and listen to music, but I am missing the restorative stillness that I used to incorporate in my days. I am not quite sure how to get that back.
On the other hand, I am having a blast. Work is hard, but I'm finally playing hard too. We go out on weeknights. We have plans. There are things to do. It's really nice.
Last weekend there was a warm spell that allowed Neil and I to spend Saturday rollerblading and getting slight sunburns. I got to wear sandals and sleveless shirts. It was amazing.
A couple of weekends ago my parents came to visit. Much fun was had. We went to a play, Fanny's First Play, which was very entertaining, we toured Mt. Vernon, we ate at amazing restaurants and just had a good time. It's nice to see family, especially being so far away from home.
Some things I have wanted to blog about but haven't had the chance:
*How deeply I love Grey's Anatomy (so much that I like to watch episodes over and over again)
*How being swamped at work is a major social problem
*My need to travel
*New music loves: Idan Raichal Project, Belle and Sebastian's Life Pursuit, Brandi Carlisle
*Strange encounters with DC people who want me to give them one of my dogs
Movie trivia bonus points to the reader that can tell me (in my comments section) which movie the title of this post comes from.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Things I Like on a Morning Commute
1. When I walk in the station, down the escalator unimpeded by fellow commuters and right onto a train.
2. Finding an open front corner seat.
3. Finding any open seat.
4. The absence of inclement weather.
5. The absence of shoving and angry glares.
6. The smiley metro employee who chats with me when he's working.
7. A cheerful/friendly -- even funny -- metro announcer.
8. The absence of delays.
9. When friendly drivers stop to let me cross the street (even when I am not using a crosswalk.)
10. When the iPod plays good music.
11. When people smile at me.
12. When I get to work on time.
1. When I walk in the station, down the escalator unimpeded by fellow commuters and right onto a train.
2. Finding an open front corner seat.
3. Finding any open seat.
4. The absence of inclement weather.
5. The absence of shoving and angry glares.
6. The smiley metro employee who chats with me when he's working.
7. A cheerful/friendly -- even funny -- metro announcer.
8. The absence of delays.
9. When friendly drivers stop to let me cross the street (even when I am not using a crosswalk.)
10. When the iPod plays good music.
11. When people smile at me.
12. When I get to work on time.
Speaking of Human Elements
I have been thinking lately about people and connections and how we take a piece of everyone we know with us always. Even people I don't know anymore are with me every day -- whether they introduced me to a favorite song, or a new musician, a way of thinking, a phrase, a saying or mannerism -- I am always collecting parts of people.
It is the parts of people that I have loved the most that are the most easily identifiable. Maybe the longer you spend with a person, the more of them you carry with you? And what if the longer the length of time between when you last left each other, the more the parts of them you've collected become a part of you -- indistinguishable -- unattributed to their original source?
The sad part is that I miss all of the people I carry with me. I miss them all in varying degrees. From my fifth grade teacher to the boyfriend that I never kissed, to the kid I tutored after school, to the coworker who encouraged me not to cry during the first week of work when I was accosted by a creepy homeless man, and the first boy that I loved. I am always missing people. It's not the kind of missing that ruins my days. It's the sweet ache of absence and I feel it for all of my family and current friends who are spread all over the world -- and for the people I have lost along the way.
I have been listening to a song on repeat that made me think of all this: Skeleton on Display by Now It's Overhead. Of course, this song is about some love affair or another, but it touches me:
"Stepping out of skin we grew together in this life we're ending."
Don't we all grow skin together in our various relationships? We forge commonality, create bonds, sometimes we create our own language...
"I will always miss you
I will always miss you
I will always."
And the chorus makes me long for my grandfather, my best friend from freshman year of college and past loves all at once.
"I am a skeleton on display."
I suppose this is true about myself. I am the old heart on my sleeve cliche. I make myself vulnerable by allowing myself to miss people in the way that I do...but I think it's worth it
I have been thinking lately about people and connections and how we take a piece of everyone we know with us always. Even people I don't know anymore are with me every day -- whether they introduced me to a favorite song, or a new musician, a way of thinking, a phrase, a saying or mannerism -- I am always collecting parts of people.
It is the parts of people that I have loved the most that are the most easily identifiable. Maybe the longer you spend with a person, the more of them you carry with you? And what if the longer the length of time between when you last left each other, the more the parts of them you've collected become a part of you -- indistinguishable -- unattributed to their original source?
The sad part is that I miss all of the people I carry with me. I miss them all in varying degrees. From my fifth grade teacher to the boyfriend that I never kissed, to the kid I tutored after school, to the coworker who encouraged me not to cry during the first week of work when I was accosted by a creepy homeless man, and the first boy that I loved. I am always missing people. It's not the kind of missing that ruins my days. It's the sweet ache of absence and I feel it for all of my family and current friends who are spread all over the world -- and for the people I have lost along the way.
I have been listening to a song on repeat that made me think of all this: Skeleton on Display by Now It's Overhead. Of course, this song is about some love affair or another, but it touches me:
"Stepping out of skin we grew together in this life we're ending."
Don't we all grow skin together in our various relationships? We forge commonality, create bonds, sometimes we create our own language...
"I will always miss you
I will always miss you
I will always."
And the chorus makes me long for my grandfather, my best friend from freshman year of college and past loves all at once.
"I am a skeleton on display."
I suppose this is true about myself. I am the old heart on my sleeve cliche. I make myself vulnerable by allowing myself to miss people in the way that I do...but I think it's worth it
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Good Little Communists
Lately, Neil and I have been using Zipcar to run errands like grocery shopping and taking the dogs to the groomer. All we have to do is go online, reserve a car and then walk a couple blocks where we use a card to open the doors and the keys are in the ignition. The system depends on the goodness of people. Each renter must pull out of the Zipcar spot, stop, get out of the car and put down an orange cone stored in the back seat to reserve the space. Any renter who drives until there is only 1/4 of a tank left is responsible for taking the gas card out of the glove box and filling up the tank of gas. All Zipcars have XM radio and renters need not worry about insurance -- like gas, it is covered by the hourly rate.
So yes, Zipcar is a bit like communism, but it works. Part of what makes us care about leaving the car clean and full of gas and returning it on time is knowing that other people like us might be picking the car up and the next time slot. It's all about the human element. If we took the car back to the rental shop and knew they'd be cleaning it and inspecting it, we would not care nearly as much -- it would be corporate -- not human. But Zipcar, with its cleverly named cars (Matrix Maddy), introduced the human element into their business and it makes me proud to participate in their communist-reminiscent car rental system... (of course, it's only the friendly customers who are communist... Zipcar is making bank.)
Lately, Neil and I have been using Zipcar to run errands like grocery shopping and taking the dogs to the groomer. All we have to do is go online, reserve a car and then walk a couple blocks where we use a card to open the doors and the keys are in the ignition. The system depends on the goodness of people. Each renter must pull out of the Zipcar spot, stop, get out of the car and put down an orange cone stored in the back seat to reserve the space. Any renter who drives until there is only 1/4 of a tank left is responsible for taking the gas card out of the glove box and filling up the tank of gas. All Zipcars have XM radio and renters need not worry about insurance -- like gas, it is covered by the hourly rate.
So yes, Zipcar is a bit like communism, but it works. Part of what makes us care about leaving the car clean and full of gas and returning it on time is knowing that other people like us might be picking the car up and the next time slot. It's all about the human element. If we took the car back to the rental shop and knew they'd be cleaning it and inspecting it, we would not care nearly as much -- it would be corporate -- not human. But Zipcar, with its cleverly named cars (Matrix Maddy), introduced the human element into their business and it makes me proud to participate in their communist-reminiscent car rental system... (of course, it's only the friendly customers who are communist... Zipcar is making bank.)
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
All Fall Down
Since moving to D.C. I have become the world's biggest klutz. I fell on the sidewalk in good weather two times. Completely fell. I blamed it on carrying too many things in my arms and being off balance -- which is probably true -- but still doesn't justify a complete wipeout... On Monday, there was snow and ice covering the sidewalk on the way to work. In spite of the fact that I was wearing snow boots AND being careful, I slipped on some black ice and fell smack on my tailbone. I like to think that I gracefully bounced back to my feet, but it's more likely that I looked hilarious and ridiculous with my big messenger bag and my snow boots and my work clothes all splayed on the sidewalk. This falling has become so commonplace that I have to laugh at it now. I mean, it's sad, sure... but it's also really funny.
I was thinking that I rarely, if ever, fall while skiing or ice skating or rollerblading. I can't remember the last time I fell skiing. I take major risks, ski way too fast, fly over jumps and bumps and still do not fall. Why then, do I so regularly come crashing down when just trying to walk along the sidewalk? I'm trying not to read anything into it.
Since moving to D.C. I have become the world's biggest klutz. I fell on the sidewalk in good weather two times. Completely fell. I blamed it on carrying too many things in my arms and being off balance -- which is probably true -- but still doesn't justify a complete wipeout... On Monday, there was snow and ice covering the sidewalk on the way to work. In spite of the fact that I was wearing snow boots AND being careful, I slipped on some black ice and fell smack on my tailbone. I like to think that I gracefully bounced back to my feet, but it's more likely that I looked hilarious and ridiculous with my big messenger bag and my snow boots and my work clothes all splayed on the sidewalk. This falling has become so commonplace that I have to laugh at it now. I mean, it's sad, sure... but it's also really funny.
I was thinking that I rarely, if ever, fall while skiing or ice skating or rollerblading. I can't remember the last time I fell skiing. I take major risks, ski way too fast, fly over jumps and bumps and still do not fall. Why then, do I so regularly come crashing down when just trying to walk along the sidewalk? I'm trying not to read anything into it.
Sunday, February 12, 2006
New Hobby
I think that Dick Cheney should consider taking up a new hobby.
The fact that our vice president shot somebody in the face is completely mind boggling. I just do not even know what to say. Isn't there an entire battery of jokes about stupid hunting accidents?
White House
We had a tour of the White House at 7:30 Saturday morning. It was one of the tours you can get by sending a request to your senator or congressman and waiting a few months. So this past Saturday was our day. They had pre-cleared us by running our social security numbers through whatever government database necessary so getting in was relatively easy.. one id check, one metal detector and we were walking in the halls of the East Wing. The very first thing we saw upon entering was a photo of the State of the Union Address with the president in the middle and Neil right above his head in the press area. It was blown up and Neil' face was recognizable. So, for another couple of weeks, Neil will be on the walls of the White House, which, even if it is the Bush White House, is pretty cool.
The rest of the tour was interesting. Really, the White House is smaller than I thought. We only got to see the first floor, but the rooms aren't as humongous as you might imagine. Of course, they're beautifully decorated and every object in them is dripping in history... but my idealized image of the place was cooler than the actual place.
Noreaster
And finally, Washington D.C. was hit by a noreaster today. Really, we only got 6 inches of snow and most of it has already melted.. but it made for a beautiful, sparkly morning and an excuse to finally wear my snow boots.
I think that Dick Cheney should consider taking up a new hobby.
The fact that our vice president shot somebody in the face is completely mind boggling. I just do not even know what to say. Isn't there an entire battery of jokes about stupid hunting accidents?
White House
We had a tour of the White House at 7:30 Saturday morning. It was one of the tours you can get by sending a request to your senator or congressman and waiting a few months. So this past Saturday was our day. They had pre-cleared us by running our social security numbers through whatever government database necessary so getting in was relatively easy.. one id check, one metal detector and we were walking in the halls of the East Wing. The very first thing we saw upon entering was a photo of the State of the Union Address with the president in the middle and Neil right above his head in the press area. It was blown up and Neil' face was recognizable. So, for another couple of weeks, Neil will be on the walls of the White House, which, even if it is the Bush White House, is pretty cool.
The rest of the tour was interesting. Really, the White House is smaller than I thought. We only got to see the first floor, but the rooms aren't as humongous as you might imagine. Of course, they're beautifully decorated and every object in them is dripping in history... but my idealized image of the place was cooler than the actual place.
Noreaster
And finally, Washington D.C. was hit by a noreaster today. Really, we only got 6 inches of snow and most of it has already melted.. but it made for a beautiful, sparkly morning and an excuse to finally wear my snow boots.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
American
Why is football so "American"? I am an American and yet, I don't really feel moved by football. I only recently learned to understand the game and to me, it still seems less exciting than most other sports. But tonight, millions of Americans are gathered around their TVs watching football and I am among them. But I am not sure why this tradition defines us. A bunch of big guys running into each other while trying to get a slippery football into the endzone...what's American about that? Everything, I guess...
***
I have bronchitis and have been sick since last Thursday. Not the most fun way to spend the weekend. Not much exciting has happened to me this past week as a result. I watched way too much TV and slept. Oh, and I had a nebulizer treatment at the doctor's office to open up my lungs. Thrilling...
Here's to more exciting things in the week to come.
Why is football so "American"? I am an American and yet, I don't really feel moved by football. I only recently learned to understand the game and to me, it still seems less exciting than most other sports. But tonight, millions of Americans are gathered around their TVs watching football and I am among them. But I am not sure why this tradition defines us. A bunch of big guys running into each other while trying to get a slippery football into the endzone...what's American about that? Everything, I guess...
***
I have bronchitis and have been sick since last Thursday. Not the most fun way to spend the weekend. Not much exciting has happened to me this past week as a result. I watched way too much TV and slept. Oh, and I had a nebulizer treatment at the doctor's office to open up my lungs. Thrilling...
Here's to more exciting things in the week to come.
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Bummer
Today is kind of a bummer. For starters it's rainy and dreary outside and that's often enough to make me feel bummed. But then there's the news today: a shooting in a postal facility in CA in which 7 people died, the death of Coretta Scott King and now this: Senate Confirms Alito to the Supreme Court which is not at all unexpected, but still a big bummer. Still the kind of thing that makes my heart sink.
Neil has a pass to watch the State of the Union in person tonight... which is really cool, regardless of who the president is, but I don't think I could attend even if I had the chance. Last year, even though I was alone on my couch, I remember swearing at my tv and being incredibly angry the entire time. I think I even switched away from the speech for a big portion in the middle because I found watching it so maddening.
In other news, I think I have mentioned here before the fact that about 10 years ago, a former version of myself volunteered to plan the 10 year high school reunion for my class. And here we are, 10 years later and I am trying to get things going with the planning. The first step has been tracking people down that I've been out of touch with. With the help of Julia (the other class agent who foolishly volunteered 10 years ago) I am nearly finished with the tracking down. It's been really cool to reconnect with people and find out what everyone is doing. People are getting married, have babies etc. This process has also been a little sad because it's made me miss Carl, my freshman year boyfriend who died of brain cancer when we were seniors in college. And in a more abstract sense, it has made me miss myself. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I miss feeling invincible, I miss the heady friendships and the late nights and the crushes that were all-consuming and so incredibly important.
To add to all the nostalgia, I also happen to be reading Prep by Curtis Steinfeld at the moment. Britten recommended it to me a while ago and I suppose the timing could not be more perfect. The book is all about high school and while I did not attend boarding school, I did attend a prep school and some of the things in the book are so dead on with my experience that it's spooky.
I am sure there is more to say on this topic. Why do we make such a big deal in our society about events as they grow distant from us in ten year increments? Is it to remind us of who we were and where we came from, or simply to make us feel old and less accomplished than we'd hoped to be? Is it about reconnecting? And once we all reconnect, will we stay in contact or just wait until someone (probably me) sends out an e-mail in another 10 years and we start over again? Since when did I become so cynical?
Today is kind of a bummer. For starters it's rainy and dreary outside and that's often enough to make me feel bummed. But then there's the news today: a shooting in a postal facility in CA in which 7 people died, the death of Coretta Scott King and now this: Senate Confirms Alito to the Supreme Court which is not at all unexpected, but still a big bummer. Still the kind of thing that makes my heart sink.
Neil has a pass to watch the State of the Union in person tonight... which is really cool, regardless of who the president is, but I don't think I could attend even if I had the chance. Last year, even though I was alone on my couch, I remember swearing at my tv and being incredibly angry the entire time. I think I even switched away from the speech for a big portion in the middle because I found watching it so maddening.
In other news, I think I have mentioned here before the fact that about 10 years ago, a former version of myself volunteered to plan the 10 year high school reunion for my class. And here we are, 10 years later and I am trying to get things going with the planning. The first step has been tracking people down that I've been out of touch with. With the help of Julia (the other class agent who foolishly volunteered 10 years ago) I am nearly finished with the tracking down. It's been really cool to reconnect with people and find out what everyone is doing. People are getting married, have babies etc. This process has also been a little sad because it's made me miss Carl, my freshman year boyfriend who died of brain cancer when we were seniors in college. And in a more abstract sense, it has made me miss myself. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I miss feeling invincible, I miss the heady friendships and the late nights and the crushes that were all-consuming and so incredibly important.
To add to all the nostalgia, I also happen to be reading Prep by Curtis Steinfeld at the moment. Britten recommended it to me a while ago and I suppose the timing could not be more perfect. The book is all about high school and while I did not attend boarding school, I did attend a prep school and some of the things in the book are so dead on with my experience that it's spooky.
I am sure there is more to say on this topic. Why do we make such a big deal in our society about events as they grow distant from us in ten year increments? Is it to remind us of who we were and where we came from, or simply to make us feel old and less accomplished than we'd hoped to be? Is it about reconnecting? And once we all reconnect, will we stay in contact or just wait until someone (probably me) sends out an e-mail in another 10 years and we start over again? Since when did I become so cynical?
Sunday, January 29, 2006
I Just Heard...
Meet the Press is on in the background as I do my ritual Sunday morning e-mail check and someone being interviewed about the possible filibuster to block the Alito nomination just said, "Well, John Kerry can never afford to be nuanced again..." Which made me think about how much I love language and intelligence in combination... I would never have thought to say "John Kerry can't be a flip-flopper ever again if he wants to have a political career" quite like that. Not to mention the fact that I agree with the sentiment... wish I knew who said it.
Also on Meet the Press, they just showed polls that said the majority (53%) of those surveyed don't care if the government taps their phone calls!!!!! Who are these people? Why are they so eager to just give away their rights?
In other news, Andy is coming to town this afternoon...and I haven't seen him since I graduated THREE years ago... so I'm very excited.
It's rainy and dreary today... I'll survive, but it's days like this that make me miss the southwest.
Meet the Press is on in the background as I do my ritual Sunday morning e-mail check and someone being interviewed about the possible filibuster to block the Alito nomination just said, "Well, John Kerry can never afford to be nuanced again..." Which made me think about how much I love language and intelligence in combination... I would never have thought to say "John Kerry can't be a flip-flopper ever again if he wants to have a political career" quite like that. Not to mention the fact that I agree with the sentiment... wish I knew who said it.
Also on Meet the Press, they just showed polls that said the majority (53%) of those surveyed don't care if the government taps their phone calls!!!!! Who are these people? Why are they so eager to just give away their rights?
In other news, Andy is coming to town this afternoon...and I haven't seen him since I graduated THREE years ago... so I'm very excited.
It's rainy and dreary today... I'll survive, but it's days like this that make me miss the southwest.
Friday, January 27, 2006
Things I Love
1) Old friends
2) The cold air that rushes into my face and blows my hair back behind my head as a metro approaches in DC's metro tunnels.
3) Meeting new people
4)Discovering common ground
5)Reconnecting
6)Receiving news from afar
7)A really good political discussion or debate
8)The feeling of missing characters from a novel once I've finished reading it
9)The surprising way an unexpected apology, for a crime long ago forgiven but not forgotten, can fill me up and make me feel more complete than before.
10)Honesty
11)The affection of animals
12)The sense of accomplishment that comes from a well-written sentence
13)Family
14)The disorienting feeling of being in a foreign country
15)The ambiguity of borders
16)People who understand me better than I understand myself
17)Physical accomplishments and exhaustion
18)Full days
19)Fresh raspberries
20)Hot, milky coffee
21)Unexpected phone calls
22)Shared memories
23)Good comedy
24)Music that makes the bottom of my stomach drop out in that good way that makes me gasp for breath
25)Warm slippers
26)The feeling of sun on my closed eyelids
27)Seeing the talents of my friends and family
28)Travel
29)Pop culture
30)Internationalism
31)Information
32)Knowing the most current celebrity gossip
33)Making other people feel good
34)Passion
35)Sleeping in later than I should
36)Long hugs from people I admire
37)Looking in the eyes of someone who loves me as they look in mine
38)Owning current gadgets
39)Not owning a car
40)reminiscing
41)Knowing myself better each day
42)My cell phone
43)Spirituality
44)The aspens when they change colors in the Santa Fe Mountains each fall
45)Green chile
46)Franklin Mountain State Park
47)My iPod Nano
48)Unopened e-mail
49)Scrabble
50)Thinking about things I love...
1) Old friends
2) The cold air that rushes into my face and blows my hair back behind my head as a metro approaches in DC's metro tunnels.
3) Meeting new people
4)Discovering common ground
5)Reconnecting
6)Receiving news from afar
7)A really good political discussion or debate
8)The feeling of missing characters from a novel once I've finished reading it
9)The surprising way an unexpected apology, for a crime long ago forgiven but not forgotten, can fill me up and make me feel more complete than before.
10)Honesty
11)The affection of animals
12)The sense of accomplishment that comes from a well-written sentence
13)Family
14)The disorienting feeling of being in a foreign country
15)The ambiguity of borders
16)People who understand me better than I understand myself
17)Physical accomplishments and exhaustion
18)Full days
19)Fresh raspberries
20)Hot, milky coffee
21)Unexpected phone calls
22)Shared memories
23)Good comedy
24)Music that makes the bottom of my stomach drop out in that good way that makes me gasp for breath
25)Warm slippers
26)The feeling of sun on my closed eyelids
27)Seeing the talents of my friends and family
28)Travel
29)Pop culture
30)Internationalism
31)Information
32)Knowing the most current celebrity gossip
33)Making other people feel good
34)Passion
35)Sleeping in later than I should
36)Long hugs from people I admire
37)Looking in the eyes of someone who loves me as they look in mine
38)Owning current gadgets
39)Not owning a car
40)reminiscing
41)Knowing myself better each day
42)My cell phone
43)Spirituality
44)The aspens when they change colors in the Santa Fe Mountains each fall
45)Green chile
46)Franklin Mountain State Park
47)My iPod Nano
48)Unopened e-mail
49)Scrabble
50)Thinking about things I love...
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
My Worst Nightmare
There are few things that make my blood boil more than people who are pro-life. This does not meant that I don't count some pro-life people among my friends, but it does mean that we do not discuss the abortion debate when we're together. It is one of those things that I will never change my mind about. I believe that all women should have the power to choose what they do with their bodies. It's that simple. I believe this strongly and passionately. This does not mean that I cheer every abortion performed. I don't. But I want to know that I can have an abortion if that's something I feel I need to do for whatever reason. I want to know that every woman in America has the power of self determination. This is a free society, or at least it is supposed to be. Women should not become second-class citizens.
So yesterday on my way to work, I had to wade through streams of pro-life demonstrators as they flooded off the metro. There were probably thousands in sum and I came into contact with hundreds. They were perky little girls with hoodies that said things like "Abortion is America's Hidden Holocaust" on them. They were middle aged men, they were mothers and sisters and brothers. They looked really normal if you could ignore their "End Roe" signs. But as I walked past them, bumping into them, being shoved by their sheer numbers, I felt panic. All of these people want to take away my rights. They believe in what they believe for their own good reasons, but most likely they don't realize the consequences of what they're attempting to do. Back alley abortions, unwanted children, the marginalization of women... the list goes on. I wanted to go home and put on my walking shoes and hold my own demonstration... I know some pro-choice people did just that. But instead, I went to work, leaving it up to other people to decide on this issue that I care so much about. My own inaction was really my worst nightmare.
There are few things that make my blood boil more than people who are pro-life. This does not meant that I don't count some pro-life people among my friends, but it does mean that we do not discuss the abortion debate when we're together. It is one of those things that I will never change my mind about. I believe that all women should have the power to choose what they do with their bodies. It's that simple. I believe this strongly and passionately. This does not mean that I cheer every abortion performed. I don't. But I want to know that I can have an abortion if that's something I feel I need to do for whatever reason. I want to know that every woman in America has the power of self determination. This is a free society, or at least it is supposed to be. Women should not become second-class citizens.
So yesterday on my way to work, I had to wade through streams of pro-life demonstrators as they flooded off the metro. There were probably thousands in sum and I came into contact with hundreds. They were perky little girls with hoodies that said things like "Abortion is America's Hidden Holocaust" on them. They were middle aged men, they were mothers and sisters and brothers. They looked really normal if you could ignore their "End Roe" signs. But as I walked past them, bumping into them, being shoved by their sheer numbers, I felt panic. All of these people want to take away my rights. They believe in what they believe for their own good reasons, but most likely they don't realize the consequences of what they're attempting to do. Back alley abortions, unwanted children, the marginalization of women... the list goes on. I wanted to go home and put on my walking shoes and hold my own demonstration... I know some pro-choice people did just that. But instead, I went to work, leaving it up to other people to decide on this issue that I care so much about. My own inaction was really my worst nightmare.
Saturday, January 21, 2006
Odds and Ends
It's been a while. Not because I haven't had things to blog about... but because there's never a good time to do it. Lots of things have been happening this month.. below a few of the highlights.
1) Recently, Neil and I were walking home one evening when we saw and heard a street musician. He was a white man with a brownish grey beard and was probably between 45 and 60 and he was playing a guitar hooked up to an amp. As we approached we realized he was singing Johnny Be Good. (Note; I love street musicians. In college, I did my final photography project on street musicians. I spent weeks roaming around the city taking pictures of musicians wherever I could find them and dropping money in their buckets or violin cases. As a result of my affection for street musicians, I usually smile and have generally warm happy feelings when I see a street musician.) The man looked very dirty and worse for the wear, but I was still excited as we walked by him. The lyrics we heard are a follows: "He never ever could really read or write/But he'll fuck you in the ass..."
Neil and I were both completely shocked. I did a double take and then walked as quickly as possible away from Mr. Skeezy Street Musician. As soon as we were about ten paces away, we started laughing uncontrollably.
(my apologies for the swearing, but it was central to the story.)
2) Not too long ago I ran into a friend from elementary school on the street in DC. We exchanged phone numbers and that was that. Tonight, I went to dinner with Kate. She called and invited me out and her other friend from high school who I also know (or knew) was in town. To top it off, Kate has a friend from law school who went to Northwestern with me and while we didn't know each other, we had tons of friends in common etc. So the evening was spent reminiscing about high school, elementary school and college intermittently. It was great and while I had been apprehensive about having dinner with people I hadn't spoken to in ten years or more, I really enjoyed myself and relished the opportunity to reconnect.
3) I think I am becoming more Jewish. I know that sounds strange... but here goes. I work for a Jewish nonprofit. While it isn't anything I ever pictured myself doing, I have really been enjoying it and from the minute I had my interview, I knew it would be a good place to work. However, when I accepted the job, I told myself that I wasn't going to let myself get sucked in. I would not attend services and I would not feel obligated to become more observant than I want to be. (basically, I am not a religious person.) However, being here and working in a Jewish office, I have really begun to appreciate some things about my religion. My favorite friend from work is Orthodox and incredibly observant and at first I couldn't even wrap my mind around that. I did not understand how someone I have so much in common with could be so incredibly religious when I viewed that kind of extreme observance as oppressive. But I am starting to understand it. There is something so incredible about the community... about having Jewish community around you, about celebrating things with your friends and family etc. Today, I had lunch with my new friends after they went to services and it was great. We basically just hung out all afternoon talking and eating and enjoying each other's company and because it was Shabbat, there were no distractions. Nobody had anything better to do than to sit around in that apartment and talk. I am not going to become orthodox, I probably won't even begin attending services regularly, but it is really nice to understand, at last, a little bit more about Judaism and community and what religion can be that is positive...
It's been a while. Not because I haven't had things to blog about... but because there's never a good time to do it. Lots of things have been happening this month.. below a few of the highlights.
1) Recently, Neil and I were walking home one evening when we saw and heard a street musician. He was a white man with a brownish grey beard and was probably between 45 and 60 and he was playing a guitar hooked up to an amp. As we approached we realized he was singing Johnny Be Good. (Note; I love street musicians. In college, I did my final photography project on street musicians. I spent weeks roaming around the city taking pictures of musicians wherever I could find them and dropping money in their buckets or violin cases. As a result of my affection for street musicians, I usually smile and have generally warm happy feelings when I see a street musician.) The man looked very dirty and worse for the wear, but I was still excited as we walked by him. The lyrics we heard are a follows: "He never ever could really read or write/But he'll fuck you in the ass..."
Neil and I were both completely shocked. I did a double take and then walked as quickly as possible away from Mr. Skeezy Street Musician. As soon as we were about ten paces away, we started laughing uncontrollably.
(my apologies for the swearing, but it was central to the story.)
2) Not too long ago I ran into a friend from elementary school on the street in DC. We exchanged phone numbers and that was that. Tonight, I went to dinner with Kate. She called and invited me out and her other friend from high school who I also know (or knew) was in town. To top it off, Kate has a friend from law school who went to Northwestern with me and while we didn't know each other, we had tons of friends in common etc. So the evening was spent reminiscing about high school, elementary school and college intermittently. It was great and while I had been apprehensive about having dinner with people I hadn't spoken to in ten years or more, I really enjoyed myself and relished the opportunity to reconnect.
3) I think I am becoming more Jewish. I know that sounds strange... but here goes. I work for a Jewish nonprofit. While it isn't anything I ever pictured myself doing, I have really been enjoying it and from the minute I had my interview, I knew it would be a good place to work. However, when I accepted the job, I told myself that I wasn't going to let myself get sucked in. I would not attend services and I would not feel obligated to become more observant than I want to be. (basically, I am not a religious person.) However, being here and working in a Jewish office, I have really begun to appreciate some things about my religion. My favorite friend from work is Orthodox and incredibly observant and at first I couldn't even wrap my mind around that. I did not understand how someone I have so much in common with could be so incredibly religious when I viewed that kind of extreme observance as oppressive. But I am starting to understand it. There is something so incredible about the community... about having Jewish community around you, about celebrating things with your friends and family etc. Today, I had lunch with my new friends after they went to services and it was great. We basically just hung out all afternoon talking and eating and enjoying each other's company and because it was Shabbat, there were no distractions. Nobody had anything better to do than to sit around in that apartment and talk. I am not going to become orthodox, I probably won't even begin attending services regularly, but it is really nice to understand, at last, a little bit more about Judaism and community and what religion can be that is positive...
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Loss
I found out this morning that my friend, ballet teacher, piano teacher, mentor and a source of considerable inspiration died on Christmas Eve. He definitely has one of the best obituaries ever. Something tells me he either wrote it or gave specific instructions about what it contains. The world is just a little bit worse now that Zsolt no longer lives in it. But, he made a lot of peoples' lives a lot better for having lived.
Zsolt, I will miss you...
ZSOLT of Santa Fe died Dec. 24, 2005, after a long illness. He was a lifelong humanitarian, a monkish poet and good friend. A citizen of the world, he grew up in Boulder, Colo.; London; and Quito, Ecuador, and resided in Boston, Paris, San Francisco and Bern, Switzerland -- making Santa Fe his primary residence for the past 21 years. He is survived by his parents, Barbara and Alan Robb; recent housemates, Michael and Galen; and many other people of all ages who befriended and adopted Zsolt into their families. In lieu of sending flowers, take a few moments to read a passage from the Bhagavad Gita, the Tao Te Ching, or listen to Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. A celebration of life is tentatively planned for Jan. 8, 2006.
I found out this morning that my friend, ballet teacher, piano teacher, mentor and a source of considerable inspiration died on Christmas Eve. He definitely has one of the best obituaries ever. Something tells me he either wrote it or gave specific instructions about what it contains. The world is just a little bit worse now that Zsolt no longer lives in it. But, he made a lot of peoples' lives a lot better for having lived.
Zsolt, I will miss you...
ZSOLT of Santa Fe died Dec. 24, 2005, after a long illness. He was a lifelong humanitarian, a monkish poet and good friend. A citizen of the world, he grew up in Boulder, Colo.; London; and Quito, Ecuador, and resided in Boston, Paris, San Francisco and Bern, Switzerland -- making Santa Fe his primary residence for the past 21 years. He is survived by his parents, Barbara and Alan Robb; recent housemates, Michael and Galen; and many other people of all ages who befriended and adopted Zsolt into their families. In lieu of sending flowers, take a few moments to read a passage from the Bhagavad Gita, the Tao Te Ching, or listen to Beethoven's Fifth Symphony. A celebration of life is tentatively planned for Jan. 8, 2006.
Wednesday, January 04, 2006
Brand New
It's a brand new year. 2006 seems like a good number to me. I like the way it looks. I like that it's an even number... there just seems to be something friendly about it, something appealing. Anyways, so far, this year is going well.
It started off in a somewhat drunken stupor, as all new years should. This year, Rachel and Brian were in town and we went to a party at one of Rachel's Dartmouth friends' houses. Neil and I actually knew Johnny from a few winters back when he lived in Santa Fe and interned at a magazine, so it wasn't completely weird -- we weren't surrounded by strangers. Anyways, we had a great evening of laughing, talking, standing by the fire and just enjoying the last hours of 2005. Sometime after 3 a.m. and shortly after I noticed daylight in the backyard through a window in Johnny's house (the fire got a little out of hand), we headed back to our apartment where the four of us ate french toast and went to sleep at 4. I cannot remember the last time I went to bed that late and it felt great.
The next morning, we met a group of people from the party at our favorite breakfast place, The Waffle Shop. The Waffle Shop is the kind of establishment that was built at least 50 years ago and when it was new, I am positive it was a shining beacon of modernism in the heart of the city, but hasn't been REALLY cleaned since opening day. I am not saying it's a dirty restaurant...the food is cooked in a clean environment, but the diner itself has not really been kept up. No changes have been made, no improvements, no deep cleaning. The food, however, is amazing. I believe they make the best waffles I have ever had. So, 2006 began with good company and an amazing waffle.
After brunch, we went for a walk on the National Mall and the weather was amazing. Neil even wore short sleeves. The walk was followed by a satisfyingly long nap and later I watched a cheesy movie. It was a great way to spend the first day of a new year. Here's hoping 2006 is as good as I think it will be.
It's a brand new year. 2006 seems like a good number to me. I like the way it looks. I like that it's an even number... there just seems to be something friendly about it, something appealing. Anyways, so far, this year is going well.
It started off in a somewhat drunken stupor, as all new years should. This year, Rachel and Brian were in town and we went to a party at one of Rachel's Dartmouth friends' houses. Neil and I actually knew Johnny from a few winters back when he lived in Santa Fe and interned at a magazine, so it wasn't completely weird -- we weren't surrounded by strangers. Anyways, we had a great evening of laughing, talking, standing by the fire and just enjoying the last hours of 2005. Sometime after 3 a.m. and shortly after I noticed daylight in the backyard through a window in Johnny's house (the fire got a little out of hand), we headed back to our apartment where the four of us ate french toast and went to sleep at 4. I cannot remember the last time I went to bed that late and it felt great.
The next morning, we met a group of people from the party at our favorite breakfast place, The Waffle Shop. The Waffle Shop is the kind of establishment that was built at least 50 years ago and when it was new, I am positive it was a shining beacon of modernism in the heart of the city, but hasn't been REALLY cleaned since opening day. I am not saying it's a dirty restaurant...the food is cooked in a clean environment, but the diner itself has not really been kept up. No changes have been made, no improvements, no deep cleaning. The food, however, is amazing. I believe they make the best waffles I have ever had. So, 2006 began with good company and an amazing waffle.
After brunch, we went for a walk on the National Mall and the weather was amazing. Neil even wore short sleeves. The walk was followed by a satisfyingly long nap and later I watched a cheesy movie. It was a great way to spend the first day of a new year. Here's hoping 2006 is as good as I think it will be.
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