To The Guy Who Stood In Front of the Fan at the Gym Tonight

Dear Guy,
I know you live across the hall from me and I am supposed to be a good neighbor. In fact, I would much rather like my neighbors than not. However, ever since I learned that you stood my friend up on a Friday night and then DIDN'T EVEN CALL her to apologize, but instead sent a lame e-mail, I have been having my doubts about you.

This evening, when I saw you at the gym, I decided to take the high road and smile. You smiled and waved back. The gym was at least 85 degrees and the air conditioning is apparently broken since the door was propped open with a large dumbbell and there was a big industrial-strength fan whirring in the corner. I tried not to be annoyed that you were listening to an iPod and had the volume on the TV very loud. I tried not to be bothered that you seemed to have hidden the remote and I could not turn the TV by my machine on. But when you stood directly between me and the fan when you could have stood at any other point in the fan's path and you blocked every bit of cool air that was heading in my direction for more than 20 minutes of my 30-minute workout, I began to strongly dislike you. I spent at least 15 minutes trying to come up with a not-too-bitchy way to explain to you that it was a tad toasty in my corner. Then I began to embrace the heat thinking that I'd at least sweat out all my water weight while burning my 270 calories. Occasionally, you would turn around while taking a break from your weight-lifting and grunting. I wondered when you saw me completely soaked in sweat and as red as a tomato, why it wouldn't click in your brain that I might be HOT! But apparently it did not. You even stood there for a time while not working out, lifting your shirt to feel the cold air on your skin. I wanted to puke! When you left the gym, I had a little celebration on my precor.

Are you the most inconsiderate person on the planet or are you just completely clueless?

Signed,
Your Sweaty Neighbor

Alive

I am alive. Sean told me I need to update my blog, which is obviously true, so here I am. Hopefully I didn't scare away all five of my readers with my long absence.

I don't really have an excuse for not updating, except that once in a while I don't feel like sharing, or I let life get in my way...I'm not really sure.

Currently I am in a seriously introspective state. It's that time of year when I find myself questioning everything. Am I doing the right things to make myself happy and successful? Am I living a quality life? Who am I? Really, it's all exhausting. I have been listening to lots of whiny emo music on my iPod in the mornings and moping a little bit. I'm not proud of this, but it's the truth.

Then last night, Neil and I walked home from happy hour on Capitol Hill. We had to cross in front of the Capitol building and it was early twilight. The Capitol lawn was covered in a shimmering blanket of lightning bugs and it looked completely magical. There was an Army band playing convincing cover songs on the Capitol steps and a sizeable crowd had gathered to listen. As we walked by, I had a moment of clarity, providing hope that I will eventually emerge from this fog of introspection. Wish me luck.

Also on the way home we saw (and I nearly stepped on) a cockroach and then we crossed paths with a large rat. Ahh city living in the summer...